Would our Founding Fathers Take a Knee?

Thomas Jefferson came to me in a dream last night, imploring me to buy a ticket for an NFL football game.  He told me to jump down on the field during the national anthem, fall to both knees, bow my head with both hands clasped tightly together and fervently pray to God for our country to turn from her wicked ways and to heal our land.

Shocked and taken somewhat aback by his request, I guardedly asked President Jefferson if he was coming to me from Heaven or Hell.   My whole heart agrees with his inspiring words, “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness,” but I’m somewhat troubled by what he wrote to his nephew Peter Carr, in 1787; "Question with boldness even the existence of a god;” Dream Jefferson’s reply was pointedly simple; “Should I compel you to conform to my beliefs, or you to direct mine, when God himself leaves it to us to freely choose.”

Moving on, I asked a more practical question, “Do you realize what will happen to me if I honor your request?”  Some will praise me for kneeling during the anthem, but soundly criticize me for having the audacity to pray in public.  The extreme might even call for me to be thrown in a lion’s den or fiery furnace.  Others would condemn me as unpatriotic and demand I leave the country for kneeling, but still post my picture alongside Tim Tebow for displaying my faith.  Aside from criticism, there would be a more tangible cost for my action.   An arrest would likely result in the suspension of my security clearance and loss of my job.  Before deciding, I awoke to the smell of coffee, and the sound of my sweet wife singing Korean hymns and moving furniture.

Retreating from the upheaval of “Furniture Moving Day” with a steaming cup of coffee to a quiet room, I browsed Facebook until a post from a fine Air Force Captain eerily requesting “dialogue and *civil* discourse” on the very subject of my dream motivated me to exercise my constitutional right of free speech.

As a military veteran and current civil servant, I have voluntarily accepted restrictions on my liberties, not out of blind nationalism, but from a sincere belief in the ideals our country was founded on and the freedoms we currently enjoy.   I took an oath to defend those freedoms and pray for the courage to keep my promise.  When the national anthem plays, I silently stand with my hand over my heart and show due respect to our flag.   Conversely, I’m deeply offended when others exercising their freedom to dissent is deemed an affront to my service.  Every prayer uttered, speech freely given, or assembly peacefully gathered honors my service regardless of whether I agree with the content or not.  Our military mirrors society, with a wide range of beliefs and opinions, and to imply we always stand together is wrong.  No one has the right to hack my voice or the views of those I serve alongside.  These thoughts are not something I’ve just come up with this morning.  I’ve pondered them for many years.

Several decades ago, while attending a military leadership course, I was given an unwelcome debate assignment to defend flag burning.  Fortunately, I never had to stand before an unfriendly audience as another subject was selected for the in-class debate.  However, the basic premise of the argument I was going to make, “Opportunity Cost” still influences the beliefs I hold today.

Opportunity cost is an economics term that refers to the value of what you have to give up in order to choose something else.   To better explain the concept, take a few moments and make a list of everything important in your home.   If your house was on fire and you could only escape with the first item on your list, the opportunity cost of your choice is the loss of everything else. While my retirement flag holds significant sentimental value to me, I wouldn’t think twice about saving my dog over it.  A flag can easily be replaced.  Today I’m asking you to make another list, including the flag and national anthem.  In our virtual fire, you’ll be able to keep both the flag/anthem and everything listed above.  Everything below them will be lost forever.  While I’m still struggling with where to place family and self, this is my example list:

1.   Freedom of Religion
2.   Freedom of Speech
3.   Freedom of Assembly
4.   Democratic Elections
5.   Freedom of the Press
6.   Due Process
7.   Freedom from unreasonable searches and seizures
8.   2^nd Amendment Right to Bear Arms
9.   Separation of Powers between Executive, Legislative, Judicial branches
10.   25^th Amendment
11.   Family
12.   Life (Self)
13.   Liberty
14.   Pursuit of Happiness
15.   Property rights
16.   Flag
17.   Anthem
18.   Pledge of Allegiance
19.   18^th Amendment
20.   Possessions

The flag and anthem are merely symbols representing our priceless rights and values and in themselves have nominal value in comparison to what they truly epitomize.  It’s tremendously ironic that allowing our flag to be burned diminishes none of the freedoms it represents, while preventing its destruction (or obligating patriotism) weakens the very freedoms countless patriots have died to defend.   If compelled by unconstitutional law, intimidation, or force to honor men or idols, we should neither stand nor kneel.  We should turn our backs.

The Cow Tipping Challenge

https://modernfarmer.com/2013/09/cow-tipping-mh-oytr-bullcrap/

Every so often, I see something on the Internet irks me so much I’m compelled to respond. Several years ago, (I’ve never claimed to respond quickly) I read an article (link above) by a Mr. Jake Swearingen disputing “Cow Tipping,”  a hallmark activity of my youth.  Those of you who know my brother Gary, will surely consider the plausibility of his founder claim (or at least being one of the early pioneers). Having been right beside him in the early days, I can’t recall anyone ever accomplishing the feat before us.  For the Millennials among us, imagine reading an article 40 years from now asserting your generation never consumed a single Tide pod or even the existence of something as temptingly easy as planking.   I’m guessing you’ll be overjoyed about creating a permanent record of your accomplishments in the cloud and will quickly task your virtual assistant to research, draft, and post a pointed response.

There will always be those who question whether man ever really landed on the moon, whether the president was actually born in America, the certainty of the impending ice age, or one of the crowning achievements of my generation, "Cow Tipping."  Today, technology is making it harder on the deniers.  Those of us with an adequate amount of common sense will quickly accept the photo above as positive planking proof.  While I never accepted the Tide pod challenge, and probably wouldn’t admit it if I did, some might say, “Kelly must have only had powder or liquid in the house.”   I’d beg to disagree.   Unlike a small minority of our generation who’ve somehow beaten the odds and survived, I like to think I’ve matured and only still  participate in low risk events absent of physical discomfort.

I’d never consider encouraging the younger generation to emulate the truly foolish members of my generation, but the following video shows we still have a few who are still overcoming the odds and remain with us.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-XM-Gbj2dPw

While I can’t imagine any circumstance where slapping a bear on the butt is a good idea, tipping a cow under the tutelage of an experienced hand, while somewhat risky, will produce a memorable life experience.  However, I would recommend anyone undertaking a cow tipping adventure be able to distinguish the difference between a cow and a bull and it’s always a good idea to inform the rancher beforehand.

Getting back to my original purpose of proving Mr. Swearingen wrong, I believe it’s worthwhile to refute a few of his key points for the benefit of those who haven’t yet experienced a successful tip and may still be a little skeptical.    In his article, Mr. Swearingen asserts cow tipping never existed because there isn’t a documented record on social media.  My abbreviated response is “duh!”   In the 1970s, social media was rotary phones connected to land lines (often shared).  While video technology was in its infancy, the cameras were large, didn’t work well in the dark, and priced well above the means of the usual cow tipping participants. 

Mr. Swearingen also paints an unrealistic scenario and cherry picks variables designed to support his supposed scientific proof.  His claim that cows don’t sleep standing up doesn’t account for the presence of cactus.  Would you be willing to lay down on a cactus plant?  Additionally, a quick Google search will show the average weight of a Jersey cow is considerably less than a Holstein.  Correct me if I’m wrong Gary, but in all our attempts I don’t remember ever encountering a single Holstein.  Perhaps the most significant misassumption, is his physical calculations are based on level ground.  Anyone who’s ever been in eastern Colorado can’t deny the ever-present wind.  Cows naturally seek sleep on the back side of hills to escape it.  Approaching the cow from the opposite side of hill is key to accomplishing the difficult task of approaching the cow undetected. Moreover, factor in a 10-30 degree slope and the probability of a couple of enthusiastic youths succeeding exponentially improves.

I'm somewhat disappointed in recent developments to automate the tip (above).  I'm sure the success rate is much higher, but at the unfortunate expense of most of the intangible benefits. 

It’s truly a shame when a generation neglects to pass on its best to those who follow.  For those of my generation who’ve experienced the thrill and personal gratification of tipping a cow, I challenge you to enlist the support of several of our youth, instruct them in the proper strategy/technique, and document your success on social media.  While the doubters will likely cry fabrication, a new cohort of believers will be established.

Demise of the Holiday Tree

Picture taken early November 2016

A seed somehow found its way into a crack in a lifeless concrete world.  Overcoming adversity, it sprouted, found sustenance and grew into this little tree.   I noticed it the first time I drove by, immediately seeing a picture worth taking and a metaphor worth celebrating.  Obviously, many others saw its worth.  The little tree was eclectically and excessively adorned with Christmas decorations.    Taking a picture would’ve required stopping, or turning around, and I just drove on.

The tree was on a road I traveled often and over the months I became more attached to it.  As Valentine’s Day approached, red hearts appeared.    On the 4^th of July, it was covered in patriotic symbols and decked out in red, white, and blue.    A few weeks before Thanksgiving, Hyesuk snapped this picture of the partially decorated tree as we drove by, capturing fall colors and a homemade turkey at the pinnacle.

A few days before this past Christmas, I’d committed myself to finally stopping and taking a proper picture.   My anticipation turned into confusion as I drove by the barren sidewalk.   The tree was gone.   As I continued on, many thoughts and questions went through my mind.  I’ve recreated a few of them today.  Did a malicious vandal destroy it just to hurt others?  Was it viewed as a safety hazard and removed to protect us?  Was the person who cut it down just doing their job?   Did someone threaten to take legal action because they didn’t agree with the expression of personal beliefs on public property?   Regardless of the reason, the tree was gone.

Remains of the tree's memorial on January 2, 2016

I viewed the little tree mostly as an interesting oddity.  Many others were significantly more attached and hurt by its loss.  A constantly changing memorial  soon appeared.  Some reacted with anger and protest.  I identified with a "NOT COOL DUDE! sign.  Some expressed their grief with candles and small tokens.

Picture taken January 2, 2016

Driving by on New Year’s Eve, I noticed this tree on the other side of the road. Unfortunately, the festive hat and most of the decorations were missing when we made a special trip for pictures.  Seeing the newly turned soil at the base sprouted the seed of hope motivating our visit.  Maybe the tree had triumphed again and just moved on to a better location.

Crossing the road to take pictures of the memorial, saw my small seed meet a predictable fate.

Exiting the mall where we'd parked, the ending for this blog was written.  My remaining thoughts will go unspoken.

Political Ambiguity – The Stupidity Continues (#3 in the series)

I really would’ve liked to delay the public introduction of my “50 Caliber Sharpie Felt Tip Pen” prior to resolving trademark infringement issues and government regulatory concerns.  However, I’m compelled to bring it the marketplace early, regardless of the consequences.  After receiving a furlough notice earlier this week, I checked out of my hotel and headed home.   Frustration over all the stupidity taking place in our great nation’s capital was initially counterbalanced by a realization of how the current crisis played right into my own selfish interests.  Fortuitously, the timing of the shutdown hit right at the end of a major phase of the project I’ve been working and well before the start of the next.  Besides, unlike my mission-essential wife, I’m not  still reporting to work without receiving a paycheck in return.  I’m fortunate to spend the baseball playoffs and NFL season at home. For all of you in the US to fully understand my situation, Korea is on the other side of the planet where these momentous events take place during the day and where the stateside Sunday is our Monday.

Everything changed when I arrived home, sat down in my recliner, and turned on the TV to find the following notice on every channel of our Armed Forces Network (AFN) subscription except one (News):

“This AFN channel is currently unavailable due to the government shutdown… We thank you for your service and appreciate your patience.”

I count it a privilege to live alongside a community of American heroes and I’m thankful our elected officials took action to ensure those in uniform will continue receiving their pay, but it is clearly wrong to deprive them (and me) with such an significant part of American life.  I only wish every single one of our elected representatives could feel the wrath they’d surely experience if all their constituents were placed under a similar blackout.

Fortunately the same “CONSTITUTION” (quoted, capitalized, and bolded) that permits our congressmen to carelessly careen down a destructive path also provides us a powerful remedy to their foolish behavior.  Freedom of speech and the power of the pen were instrumental forces in the establishment and progress of our great nation.  I’m convinced the “50 Caliber Sharpie Felt Tip Pen” will be a welcome addition to the arsenal of freedom and if you act right now, you can be one of the first in your local community to freely and powerfully exercise your First Amendment rights without any registration requirement or intrusive background investigation.

Already tired and disgusted of listening to the politically-biased and self-serving diatribes of the pundits on MSN and FOX News, I’ve spent a good deal of today mapping out how to productively use this unexpected gift of free time.  After making Hyesuk’s breakfast and seeing her off at the door with a hug and a kiss, I’ll clean the kitchen and spend some quality time with our dog Sam.  Afterwards, I’ll head up the mountain behind our house, remaining there until restlessness, hunger, or inspiration directs me home. 

#1 –Out from the Wild - Political Ambiguity, 20 Feb 2012

 http://kellykonecne.blogspot.kr/2012/02/out-from-wild.html

#2 – Political Ambiguity - The Divide Widens, 29 Dec 2012

http://kellykonecne.blogspot.kr/2012/12/political-ambiguity-divide-widens.html

Bobby's New Underwear

 

http://kylenebeers.com/blog/2012/08/20/why-i-hated-merediths-first-grade-teacher-an-open-letter-to-americas-teachers/

 

When my younger (barely an adult) sister Carol posted the above link on Facebook, this picture came to mind.  Bobby's third grade teacher, Mrs. Peterson, gave it to Hyesuk.  It has always been one of her favorites.

 

 

A few days ago, Bobby’ Mom shipped him new underwear, formally recognizing his newfound status as a college graduate.   I’m certain Bobby is anxiously awaiting its arrival so he can adorn the official symbol of his landmark achievement.  While Harry Potter fans may get a chuckle over one possible "presentation of underwear" meaning, I believe the Koreans view the gift as a practical way of symbolizing the start of a new life by taking off the old and putting on the new.

 

 

The box also contains a Polo shirt, grill, and a large variety of Korean foodstuffs.  I know the food means “Love” in Korean culture, but I’ll have to make up his Mom’s meaning for the other items.   The grill means to take time with those he cares about, relax, laugh a little, and find enjoyment in life’s simpler pursuits.   The Polo shirt is meant to make him more presentable so he can find a good job, attract a nice girl, get married, and give us some grandchildren.  ;)

 

 

Bobby now holds the Kelly Konecne family branch record for the quickest graduation (5 years and 4 months) from college.  He's easily surpassed the previous record of 9 years held by his Dad, and literally blown away his Mom's 17-year mark (remarkably every credit she took applied to her degree).  While I’ve tried hard over the years to discourage sibling rivalry, in this case, I hope Laura realizes she still has an opportunity to take this prize away from her older brother ;)

 

 

I liked Bobby’s Facebook post, “Now is the time to find a job where I’m not washing dishes or bagging groceries!” He didn’t include working at the Pearl Harbor Shipyard and making sandwiches at Subway, but those jobs were also good honest work.  I know Bobby is a little anxious about finding a “better” job, but I’m impressed that he’s still working two jobs while he looks and that he graduated without a penny of debt.

 

 

Now that he’s successfully made it over one of life’s first hurdles, I’m actually glad his race hasn’t been an easy one.   Working hard and learning to live off very little is a valuable life lesson that’ll prepare him to more easily overcome future life challenges.  Maybe that’s why he chose “Now is the time to find a job”, vs. “Wait for someone to give me a job.”  Regardless, he should take a few days to bask in the glory of his present victory.

 

 

I know Bobby expects each of my blogs to contain a sermon.  It will be short.  I’m convinced the simple message of Philippians 3:13-14 is well worth a few moments of research and reflection.  All of us need to press on to our new calling.

For Carol’s 50th Birthday - Prequel to “A Memoir”

This year I sent my little sister Carol a Denver Bronco Jersey and card letting her know I wanted to give her something special for her 50^th birthday.    I'm fully aware she’s still years away from reaching this noteworthy milestone, but I’ve actually thought this one out.  I’ve even told our Mom my plans earlier this month so she can back me up if Carol claims this is just an elaborate ruse to cover up some sort of mental lapse.

 

 

With barely a teaspoon of effort, I can hear Carol’s conversation with Kevin when she opened the package.  “Doesn’t Kelly even know how old I am?  Do you think this may be the initial stages of Alzheimer’s?  I won’t divulge what likely surfaced in Kevin’s rational mind since he’d probably consider  it a breach of confidentiality on par with  insider trading, but he probably  replied in a deadpan voice (For those who know Kevin, don’t deny you’re also  hearing it) with something like, “Carol, I’m absolutely sure Kelly’s mental capacity is significantly better than  it was during his twenties. “  Anyway, I wasn’t the least  surprised when Carol sent me a bubbly Thank You message tactfully letting me know, “I also look forward to wearing it on my actual 50th birthday in a couple of years!!  It will be broken in and really comfy!”  Maybe, Carol should close her eyes and take a small step into her much more mature brother’s wonderful world of wisdom.

 

 

Imagine this.  Carol is wearing the jersey.  Someone remarks, “What a nice jersey, where did you get it?”  Carol replies, “My big brother gave it to me for me for my 50^th birthday.”  Then they utter the words truly going through their mind, “In my wildest imagination, I’d never have guessed you were already 50, How do you do it?”  It’s like a virtual fountain of youth Carol!  Please don’t ruin everything by confessing the gift was just given years too soon.

I could’ve easily just given Carol a Peyton Manning jersey and hopefully she’d of been golden for at least a year or two, but as I stated earlier I’m putting much more effort these days into thinking things through.    I still remember my son Bobby’s devastation when Mike Piazza left the Dodgers many years back.  Still a little boy, he had hard time comprehending how his favorite baseball player in the entire world could’ve ever left his favorite team.  He was to way too young to be faced with the business reality of professional sports.  All it takes is for Kinkos to be closed and suddenly your heart is broken and you’re the proud owner of an obsolete Elvis Dumervil jersey. 
 

 

 

Carol will eventually receive a Tim Tebow New York Jet’s jersey to keep her Denver Bronco’s Tim Tebow jersey company in the closet. I also picked up a Brady Quinn Bronco jersey from the same vender as a backup just in case Tebow gets poked with a hanger and can’t play. I wish I hadn’t been so cheap and spent another $4 for a Joe Montana Kansas City Chief jersey. When I got home, I realized he could’ve been the seasoned veteran mentor Tebow needs to finally get things turned around. I also changed my mind about the extra-large Brady Quinn jersey. I’m going to give it to a friend who’s a “big” Seattle fan. Besides, Carol doesn’t need a quarterback controversy in her closet.

 

 

Selecting number "12" for Carol’s jersey is significant. Even though I like the idea of it representing the fan as the “12^th Man,” it’s just a nice and totally appropriate coincidence. I didn’t want to select an active, recent  or well known player. Using "7" (John Elway) for example, could've ended up being awkward. I’ve included a link showing everyone who ever wore number 12 for the Broncos.   After reviewing the list myself, I'm pretty sure Carol is safe.

http://www.milehighreport.com/2011/3/29/2076832/denver-broncos-greats-by-the-numbers-12-charley-johnson-matthew-willis

*Please note that Gus Frerotte was a Washington Redskin when he put himself out of the game by head-butting the stadium wall in a touchdown celebration.

 

I left home when Carol was still a little girl and never got to know her well. In December of 2008, Carol sent me a story she wrote. Before then, I’d never realized we’d shared our Dad’s passion for Bronco football and her words touched my heart. This is a prequel to her story.

 

Our Dad was a big Denver Bronco football fan. One of his greatest achievements as County Commissioner was putting a UHF tower in Firstview Colorado to provide the entire county with three additional television channels out of Colorado Springs. Previously, our town only had one unreliable channel out of Goodland Kansas. I know television in general wasn’t very important to him and his political philosophy on spending money was to always say“NO!” Anytime he caught me watching TV before dinner, I’d be given a task off his never ending list of chores. While he never came right out and told me, I suspected losing TV reception right in the middle of a Bronco game was the straw that broke the camel’s back and convinced him to support spending a few tax dollars on the project.

I started watching Bronco games with my Dad for a simple reason.  I didn’t have a choice.  We only had one channel.  Even when we did get three more channels, we only had one TV, and the game was going to be on regardless of what was showing on the others.  The Broncos weren’t a good team.  While there was always a glimmer of hope and guarded optimism at the start of the season, it was usually short lived.   The Broncos had never achieved a single winning season in the team’s first 13 years.  I don’t fully understand how being constantly beat down and disappointed can build loyalty and desire, but I soon found myself caring alongside Dad.   By 1972, thoughts of ever making the playoffs or even having a winning season were beyond belief.   Hope was confined to beating a few of the other lousy teams and possibly pulling off an upset or two.

Denver won the first game of the 1972 season, but lost the next three.   The usual demands to fire the coach and replace the quarterback had already started.  I’ve taken a couple of paragraphs from the following link that gets to the heart of the next two games.   

http://www.milehighreport.com/2009/3/27/769891/mhr-s-forgotten-broncos-ch%20

*Early in the second period, Coach John Ralston pulled Steve Ramsey and put in Charley Johnson at quarterback.

“After an exchange of punts the Broncos got the ball back with less than eight minutes left in the game. We weren't much of a passing team in those days and Ralston orchestrated a time-gobbling twelve play drive. Charley Johnson executed it perfectly. With less than a minute to go Floyd Little scored his third touchdown of the day and the Broncos took a 20-16 lead. The fans went wild. Their beloved Denver Broncos were on the cusp of defeating one of the best teams in the NFC. Unfortunately Fran Tarkenton wasn't done. The hearts of the Bronco players and fans were ripped out once again as Tarkenton engineered a drive and scored with seconds left. The Broncos were defeated 20-23.”

Try as I may, I can't seem to recall this game with Minnesota.   Most Denver games were either blowouts (the bad end) or heartbreakers.

“The second elite opponent Denver would face that month would be the hated division rivals, the Oakland Raiders. The Broncos, up until this point, had lost twenty consecutive games against the dirty-rotten scoundrels and their chief henchman in Al Davis, but that streak was about to end. In probably the greatest game the Broncos' fans had ever seen from their team up until that point, Charley Johnson and the Broncos doggedly hung tough with the more talented Raiders all game long, upsetting the eventual AFC West Division Champions, 30-23 in Oakland.

Charley Johnson completed over 70% of his passes and threw for 361 yards and two touchdowns with a quarterback rating of 137.5. It would easily be Johnson's best game of his entire fifteen-year career.”

When the game clock hit zero, Dad leapt from his chair and started dancing a jig.  I’d never seen anything like that from him in my entire life, but I guess I’d also never seen Denver beat Oakland before either.  I guess you have to be a Bronco fan, or at least lived in Denver, to understand our relationship with the Raiders.  Denver lost considerably more games than they won in 1972, but Charlie Johnson, number “12”, finally gave Bronco fans a winning season.  The Bronco’s beat the Raiders and I saw my Dad dance!

Death and Taxes

 

In 1789, Benjamin Franklin wrote, ““Our new Constitution is now established, everything seems to promise it will be durable; but, in this world, nothing is certain except death and taxes.”  I’m guessing most people have only heard the “nothing is certain except death and taxes” part and probably don’t know it was originally penned in French shortly before the end of Franklin’s life.   Anyway, those additional details were new to me.   The letter was sent during the French Revolution to a friend Franklin was worried about.  For those of you who are also easily tempted into rambling down side roads, a link is provided:

 http://www.thisdayinquotes.com/2010/11/nothing-is-certain-except-death-and.html

For those who’ve remained on the main road (or somehow returned from the detour), I would like to bookend this paragraph with a quote by Will Rogers, “The only difference between death and taxes is that death doesn't get worse every time Congress meets.”

I didn’t actually take leave today to scour the Internet for historical background on Benjamin Franklin quotes, ponder the eventual demise facing us all, and certainly not to document all the interesting Internet sites I’ve visited today.  While I’ve been unequivocally prepared for my inevitable departure from this world for a good many years, I’ve only just started this year’s taxes today.  I began the morning well enough.  I downloaded all the forms and stacked all my supporting documents in organized piles.  However, my stomach vetoed my head’s desire to press forward with the day’s primary task.  Besides, I always get extra credit from Hyesuk when I willingly participate in our domestic chores.

Breakfast was great!  I made a delicious and healthy breakfast of bacon, eggs, hash browns, and a full pot of Starbuck’s coffee.  For those interested in learning more about the substantial health benefits of eating bacon and drinking coffee, I’ve included a link and an authoritative quote:

 http://www.medicalbillingschool.org/blog/health-benefits-of-bacon-infographic/?clean 

 Denise Webb has stated, “A recent study at the University of California at Davis even suggests that coffee may be good for you ... freshly brewed coffee contains antioxidant compounds that may carry as much power as vitamins C and E.” 



Thanks Ricky for sharing this.

 

During my last health checkup, my doctor actually agreed that coffee is beneficial (without sugar and cream), but he just cringed and shook his head on the bacon part.  Obviously, he doesn’t spend enough time on the Internet.  Otherwise, he’d be more inclined to listen to the sage wisdom of Thomas Jefferson, “I had rather be shut up in a very modest cottage with my books, my family and a few old friends, dining on simple bacon, and letting the world roll on as it liked, than to occupy the most splendid post, which any human power can give.”

After dropping Hyesuk off at work, spending a few hours at the library, buying groceries, and finishing lunch, I finally sat down at the computer.   Then I remembered a relevant item I’d been putting off.  Finding my July 24 post in Facebook only took a few minutes:

Our IRS saga continues. Today I received a letter that one inquiry is closed and Amount Due is $0.00. Such an empty victory. I so wanted another paragraph admitting I was right and they were wrong. On another note, they sent us a check, earlier in the week, for almost $4,500 for another year's return. Now I'm torn between listening to Hyesuk telling me to just trust them, or putting myself in a moral dilemma if I discover they're wrong again. Mom said Grandma and Grandpa were once in the same situation and ended up giving the money back. I put the check in the bank today and will look later this week to see if we lose the money or my undefeated season.

Since I was pretty much certain we’d have to send Uncle Sam a check again this year, I needed to find out if the money I’d sent aside earlier was actually ours to give back.  After several hours, the truth was finally revealed through my high school math teacher’s drawling voice, “Kelly, I’m afraid you mistakenly used Kit Carson Wildcat mathematics.  In Tiger Algebra, it’s divide and then subtract, not subtract first and then divide.”  For those of you who knew Mr. Teague, it wouldn’t surprise me at all if you can also still hear his voice, remember how Calculus saved his life in WWII, or the guidance he gave to Waylon Jennings, “Just in case making music doesn’t work out Waylon, you ought to consider learning some Geometry and Trigonometry.”  My brother Gary did a great impersonation of Mr. Teague, and like Waylon, received personalized career advice from him, “Just in case you don’t make it as a comedian Gary,...”   I don’t much like admitting when I’m wrong and probably would’ve just kept quiet about my error if fond memories of Mr. Teague hadn’t surfaced.    In my own words, “Great teachers make a big difference for a long time.”

My experience with the Ghost of Past Taxes left me mentally drained, somewhat conflicted between my fallibility and good fortune, and totally unprepared to battle my present foe.  I decided a long hot bath would solve all my problems. Actually, everything above resulted from this decision.  After quickly jotting down a few notes on my blog ideas, I took a nap.

 

My nap ended with Hyesuk calling about her ride.    On the way home, I took her out for dinner and snapped a picture for the blog.  After we got home, I started writing everything down on the computer.  That's where I am now.  Hyesuk has already gone to bed (another way of saying it’s well past my normal bedtime).  Looking back on the day, I don’t have any regrets, especially over the nap.  I even have a new found respect for an honest tax auditor who gives money back with the same righteous zeal as when taking it.  Besides, I still have two days  to, “Give back to Caesar what is Caesar’s.”